gratitude for

• the students that came to my office hours and walked away feeling a little more confident than they’d been feeling before. the looks on their faces.
• a common space, where I can help them learn
• my trustworthy instinct to bribe them with food in order to get them to come ask me for help
• a friend who smiles when I send memes.
• all of the teachers that have ever been there for me when I needed help
• my cat
• all of this music
• all of the chances to try things, and to live in new ways, that are unfurling before my eyes
• pen on paper
• knitting needles held between my fingers
• guitar strings under my fingers, too
• light on the water
• water mixed in with the dirt, as the earth thaws
• I have a home to come back to
• I have a way to get where I need to go
• walking. so much walking.
• shoes between my feet and the sidewalk
• chances to learn when I’m curious
• the simple magic of a button down shirt
• friends. old friends. new friends. love all around.
• my folks, without whom I would not be here. food and hugs and a warm bed and a shower and lovely TV shows

and also

• dog is old, but seems to be enjoying the time.
• money is tight, and everything is expensive
• car still works, but is barely holding on
• the world feels like it’s holding its breath, and people are dying on the other side of the pond
• my body is in so much pain all the time. my mind is in less pain right now than it sometimes is, but it still throbs on occasion
• I have so much more to lose right now than I ever have, that I can’t think about it without swaying
• I am battling that feeling – waiting for the other shoe to drop, not being sure if it’s safe to be happy just in case it isn’t real or true
• always very close to overwhelm
• there is so much to be done.