when you look across the room at someone and make eye contact and it’s a mutually stabilizing experience
when you’re laying back to back under a quilt and you can feel their warmth
when you know their regular order at a restaurant and the names of every pet they’ve ever had and the lyrics of some of the songs that meant something to them and which fictional characters they are totally normal about
when you talk about interesting thoughts and ideas for like five consecutive hours
when you’re too tired to socialize much but you still get their notification on your screen
when you don’t say much, but you send them a song
when you’re marching side by side or standing arm in arm at a protest taking turns holding a sign you made together and then bickering afterwards about whether or not to take it home and frame it and put it on the wall
when you give them a free beer at the end of a long day
when you ask them to hold the ball of yarn for you when you’re knitting
when they tell you about which girl’s heart they broke this week
when you’re singing harmony
when you’re sharing garlic bread
when you’re dancing and you spin them around but then you catch them
when you’re having a sword fight
when you’re working together in the middle of a rush and fall into an easy, repetitive rhythm of coordination with each other for a while and you’re greatful you don’t have to do this alone
when you’re talking shit and laughing in that sacred space that is the dishroom
when your to-be-read pile of books and shows is mostly attributable to them
when you’re holding the door
when you’re hiking up a hill and stop to rest
when you’re picking up groceries and walking in to the store from the parking lot or standing in the checkout line
when you’re sitting perfectly still in the meditation hall or working at the coffee stop and your eyes are facing forward but you can feel their presence in the room next to you anyhow
when you’re cleaning up the kitchen together after a meal
when you’re drinking tea
when you’re together